The Island Blotter

An Eastsound business experienced disorderly conduct when a self-appointed sign critic took issue with their signage and confronted staff and patrons, ultimately earning a verbal trespass—turns out he wasn't a fan of their reading material.

A Lopez business owner discovered that a local juvenile had decided to practice their autograph on a paper towel dispenser—apparently they were really trying to make a name for themselves, just in the wrong place.

A Decatur resident learned that an online travel company had created fake reservations for her property, which is ironic considering the only thing that should be fabricated on vacation is your out-of-office message.

Two Lopez drivers collided, prompting deputies and emergency medical services to respond—a reminder that the only thing you should be tailgating is your favorite restaurant.

A driver was stopped with no license, no insurance, expired registration, and an active DOC escape warrant—we towed his vehicle and gave him a ride he won't forget.

A deputy on Orcas Island conducted a traffic stop and issued the driver notices of infraction for operating without a valid license—turns out "valid operator" and "valid operator of a vehicle" are two very different things.

Deputies on Orcas Island responded to a domestic dispute, where one individual was arrested for assault in the fourth degree—which, thankfully, is several degrees below the boiling point.

Deputies on San Juan responded to a report of theft from a Friday Harbor store and searched for the suspect, though she remains at large and her island residency status remains a mystery.

A deputy on Orcas conducted a welfare check and successfully located a juvenile and reunited him with his mother—mission accomplished, no questions asked.

A homeowner on Orcas requested that a neighbor be trespassed from their property, and deputies issued a warning letter instead—consider it a polite eviction notice.

A Lopez resident was stopped for driving left of center and speeding while operating without a valid driver's license, resulting in an infraction.

An unattended live-aboard vessel decided to rearrange Fisherman Bay's real estate by dragging its anchor, creating a navigational hazard until deputies attempted to track down the owner.

A domestic violence incident was reported and documented.

Deputies on Orcas Island responded to a domestic dispute in Eastsound, where an individual was arrested for assault in the fourth degree.

A San Juan deputy responded to a domestic incident and determined it was just a verbal argument—in other words, a disagreement that didn't require a police report, but got one anyway.

A Friday Harbor shoplifter's debut in security camera footage wasn't quite the breakthrough moment they were hoping for; they were booked into jail for third-degree theft after denying involvement despite video evidence.

An Orcas deputy investigated a fraud report and found the caller had been on the receiving end of several Medicare scams—but at least their wallet remained unscathed.

An Orcas resident decided their firearm's future was in safe hands, turning it over to deputies for destruction rather than keeping it around.

Deputies responded to a San Juan domestic call that turned out to be a medical crisis involving a juvenile; the individual was medically airlifted off the island for specialized care.

What started as a domestic incident on San Juan escalated into a smoke investigation and then a knife situation, but deputies safely took the individual into protective custody without further incident.

A deputy responded to a dog bite incident on Orcas and checked in with the victim receiving medical treatment—hopefully the dog's bark was worse than its bite.

A San Juan driver learned the hard way that "left turn only" signs aren't suggestions, receiving a verbal warning for their creative interpretation of traffic laws at Nichols and Argyle.

A Lopez deputy evicted an unauthorized camper from the village park and connected them with services—proving that sometimes the best way to help someone is to tell them to pitch their tent elsewhere.

[This appears to be a duplicate/continuation of incident 25—no separate entry needed.]

A San Juan neighbor received a dog warning letter after their pup became the subject of a noise complaint, giving "ruff" justice a whole new meaning.

Lopez residents reported hearing what sounded like large explosions from San Juan or the peninsula, which remains a mystery that's still going boom in our records.

A Lopez resident reported a stolen kayak from the marina, and the investigation is paddling along—no suspect in sight yet.

An Orcas deputy found a wallet and booked it into evidence, giving new meaning to "checking your balance" at the station.

A San Juan driver en route to becoming the island's premiere donut artist was stopped for under-glow, speeding 21 miles over the limit, and creative lane selection—and was ultimately arrested for DUI, proving that some people really do take the scenic route home.

A San Juan deputy responded to a report of lost property, which we assume has not yet been found, hence the "lost" part.