The Island Blotter

A driver on Orcas Road thought the 40 mph speed limit was more of a suggestion, hitting 62 mph instead—a mathematical error that cost them an infraction and a stern reminder that math applies to traffic laws too.

Two Friday Harbor vehicles met at a four-way intersection and decided to occupy the same space—a collision of both metal and poor yield-ing judgment.

A San Juan deputy initiated a traffic stop for speeding in the 500 block of Roche Harbor Road, but the driver apparently thought "yield" was just a suggestion—they led our deputy on a half-mile scenic tour through several intersections before accepting their infraction for doing 42 in a 25.

A San Juan deputy stopped a vehicle on Tucker Avenue whose lane maintenance was about as reliable as a shopping cart with a bum wheel; the driver's breath sample came back at nearly four times the legal limit, proving they were operating well above their pay grade.

A deputy on Orcas Island pulled over a driver whose license had been suspended—turns out you really can't drive without a license, who knew? The driver learned this lesson the hard way and was arrested.

A deputy on Orcas Island stopped a speeder on Crescent Beach Drive doing 53 in a 35, issuing an infraction to someone who apparently thought the speed limit was more of a suggestion than a rule.

An Orcas Island deputy responded to an April 29 collision report and found the parties had already settled matters on scene with an exchange of information, proving that sometimes the best accidents are the ones that don't require paperwork.

A San Juan driver under 21 thought they could outrun the long arm of the law, but deputies caught up and found an alcoholic beverage that really shouldn't have been riding shotgun; the driver was arrested for DUI, resisting, and minor in possession charges.

Two Lopez drivers collided, prompting deputies and emergency medical services to respond—a reminder that the only thing you should be tailgating is your favorite restaurant.

A driver was stopped with no license, no insurance, expired registration, and an active DOC escape warrant—we towed his vehicle and gave him a ride he won't forget.

A deputy on Orcas Island conducted a traffic stop and issued the driver notices of infraction for operating without a valid license—turns out "valid operator" and "valid operator of a vehicle" are two very different things.

A Lopez resident was stopped for driving left of center and speeding while operating without a valid driver's license, resulting in an infraction.

A deputy responded to a vehicle that had taken an unscheduled ditch vacation on Roche Harbor Road; after impounding the car, they tracked down its owner at a resort, proving that no matter how far you try to escape your problems, they'll find you eventually.

A San Juan driver learned the hard way that "left turn only" signs aren't suggestions, receiving a verbal warning for their creative interpretation of traffic laws at Nichols and Argyle.

A San Juan driver en route to becoming the island's premiere donut artist was stopped for under-glow, speeding 21 miles over the limit, and creative lane selection—and was ultimately arrested for DUI, proving that some people really do take the scenic route home.

The vehicle's owner received a citation for roadway parking, learning the hard way that "no parking" signs aren't just friendly suggestions.

A vehicle on Fisherman Bay Road decided to take up more than its fair share of the northbound lane, proving that parallel parking is apparently optional when you're not paying attention.

An Orcas deputy responded to an accident with injury near Deer Harbor and arrested the driver for DUI; the driver was released with a citation and court date, with a report forwarded to the Department of Licensing.

A vehicle went off Deer Harbor Road and came to rest on the rocks below; Orcas Fire and EMS responded to extract the injured occupant, who was airlifted to the mainland for treatment.

A deputy clocked a speed demon on Orcas Road doing 52 in a 35—apparently the driver thought the posted limit was more of a suggestion, like "don't take the last donut."

A Lopez driver discovered that ditches are not ideal off-road parking spots, though fortunately a helpful friend and the laws of physics conspired to reunite vehicle and pavement without incident.

A Lopez deputy ticketed a vehicle parked in front of a No Parking sign at Agate Beach Park, because apparently snow provides excellent camouflage for reading comprehension skills.

Two vehicles met in Friday Harbor under icy conditions and nobody was hurt, proving that even collisions follow the island's motto: "We're all just sliding along together."

A San Juan driver learned the hard way that 61 in a 45 is not a math problem—it's a citation.

Both parties left the scene with valid licenses, insurance, and the knowledge that collisions require paperwork.

Two pickup trucks met on San Juan Island and decided to become better acquainted—both drivers had valid licenses and insurance, so at least somebody was prepared.

A San Juan deputy issued a citation to a driver going 60 in a 45, because apparently that driver thought the speed limit was more of a suggestion than a legal boundary.

A San Juan driver learned the hard way that "fast and roundabout" isn't a personality type—clocked at 42 in a 25, they received a citation for their enthusiastic interpretation of speed limits.

An Orcas driver decided that a 25 mph zone was more of a suggestion than a speed limit, hitting 40 mph instead; they also had the added distinction of doing so with a suspended license, making this a real two-for-one special.

A Lopez driver found out that doing 37 in a 25 on Fisherman Bay Road is a quick way to get a speeding ticket and a slower commute home.